I just attended Chen Zhonghua’s Phoenix workshop last weekend. As usual, I thought I was pretty good thanks to all the practicing I had done since last year in Iowa, and as usual, Zhonghua threw my confidence into the toilet.
It was a great workshop, although overwhelming. At least I’m more comfortable with what I think is the most important thing that was taught, namely don’t think. Just follow the directions and don’t question them. This is a big thing for me, someone who is always up in hiscomparing and questioning. Turns out that thinking is just a distraction from practicing, which is the only way to learn what is being taught. How to get out of my head? I think the answer is to practice as intently as I can. When I do that, I notice interesting things and have occasional exciting insights. It’s that excitement that keeps me going and that keeps practicing tai chi from becoming like a diet, where it takes willpower to force me to do it.
The second biggie I came away with is the need to segregate all the parts within each movement. I learned that when two parts within a movement go at the same time they are double heavy. I had not been separating the parts, which made for a prettier form, but was not leading me in a good direction. So far, I’m just working on the part up to the poundof the first section of yilu. It is so hard! But it’s starting to feel right, especially if I practice it with stalking power. With that power, each segment of each movement seems to slip into place.
These two things are enough for me to practice right now. I’m already starting to feel human again and it’s a given that my confidence will be back by this summer in Iowa, just in time to be destroyed by the master again!