Master Chen this email is my thoughts on taiji and other things you have taught me and the reason I am sending this is because I think I am right and now that I think that I can only see how I am right so the true purpose of this email is to find out where I am wrong so any response will be appreciated, and please hold nothing back.
First in practicing push hands I realized what I do is nothing like the form or anything close to that. In fact what I do is more like the opposite. The way I saw this was if I stop in the middle of pushing with John or trying a move and then with him away I recreate the same feeling and intent I had when i was pushing him it is as if I don’t even know how to move. What happens is that my whole body is actually going upwards and even my heels the only things that are not going anywhere are my feet and the spot I was touching him.
This reminded me of how you say that it is about how fast your feet are. When I push my feet are as slow as possible. So in reality all my effort just comes back to me and my opponent does the same thing so it is who is stronger and we are both ridiculously weak. I thought up an analogy.
A rocket ship needs a tremendous amount of force to move because what is pushes on moves so easily, pushing on air a rocket ship has to move enough air until the amount of air pushing it is so great that the rocket moves but a gun is much more efficient because of the material and the structure. It is natures way that everything finds the easiest path. So the gun is made so that the easiest place the explosion has to go is through the barrel and the only thing in the way is the bullet. The air moves so easily that is why rocket has so much trouble moving. So I realized if you want to move then you need something that won’t budge and if you don’t want to move you need something to move.This concept seems to me as the same thing as laying the tracks. The form is a restriction and until it is no longer a restriction we can’t use it, and the truth, is the way i see it is, that the form or proper way to move is actually freedom and that the way I move right now is the restriction. Horizontal movement versus vertical movement. The best way to move is a straight line because it transfers instantly. But we are not straight lines however Hong said seek the straight through the curve so it can be done.